Brianna's 9th Birthday

It's been nine years. And we finally had a beautiful, sunny, 50-degree day to visit the cemetery on Brianna's birthday. We even left our coats in the car!

As I reflect on Brianna's birth nine years ago, I remember those long days of hospital bed rest, and I remember tight contractions starting the evening of February 13th. "Too soon," I thought, "It's too soon!" Near midnight, my water broke and we knew Brianna's birth was imminent. We also knew that Brianna was too small to survive. Looking back, I see that nothing is "too soon" or "too late" with God. His timing is perfect. I am so grateful that God went on to bless us with two more beautiful girls. This morning at our school devotions, I sat next to Audrey and heard her singing the alto line to "It is Well" as I sang soprano. God is so generous, and I am grateful. Life, no matter how long or short, is a gift. It is well with my soul.

So happy…

… I get to be their momma!

Spring Piano Recital

These two performed wonderfully at their piano recital last night.  Bravo!

Recitation Night

Every spring, the students at Providence Christian Academy hold a recitation night in which they present some of what they have been learning at school.  We were so proud of all their work!

 

The House with the Indoor Pool

My brother and his family live in a suburb of St. Louis, and we try to take a yearly trip to see them.  This year, we stayed at a VRBO with an indoor swimming pool.  The kids loved it, but most of all they loved spending time in the sunshine with their cousins.

Tangled Party

Friday was Audrey’s 7th birthday party.  She only has 6 girls in her class, but one of them shares the same birthday with her!  So Audrey asked if she could have a Rapunzel birthday party with Hope at our house after school on Friday.  After a few texts back and forth with Hope’s mom, it was settled.  The girls had a great time and especially enjoyed a visit from Rapunzel herself!  She sang, read stories, and painted their faces.  Such a fun afternoon!

He is Risen!

Because He lives, I can face tomorrow. Because He lives, all fear is gone! Because I know He holds the future and life is worth the living just because He lives. 

Logan’s Birthday

Happy Birthday to Logan!  This year, Logan had a snow day on his birthday so we postponed his birthday dinner by one day and met my parents at a Japanese restaurant, House of Kobe, for Logan’s birthday meal.  The next weekend, he had a birthday party with two school friends at Sky Zone (indoor trampoline center) with pizza and ice cream at our house afterward.

Rainbows and Promises

Eight years in heaven for our Brianna Dawn today.  We visited her grave and the cupcake shop yesterday, and today we’re watching the snow fall outside and remembering those days of prayer and sorrow and thanking God that He keeps His promises.

Yesterday was a bright sunny day at the cemetery, and it reminded me of the rainbow we saw 8 years ago on our way out the door to Brianna’s funeral.  A rainbow in February.  I’ve never seen a February rainbow since, but it was a beautiful gift and a reminder to hold on to His promises in the midst of heartache.

We sure do miss her, though.  Thanks to those who have remembered Brianna with us today.  We trust that God is good, even when life doesn’t make sense, and we believe that someday He will make all things right.  Our eyes are fixed on these promises.

Merry Christmas 2015!

Well, hello again!  It’s been almost a year.  I admit, when big life changes happen it’s hard for me to keep up with the blog.  In the past 10 months since the last update, we sold our house, bought a new house, did some home renovations and decorating projects, and switched schools for the kids.  Life is flying by!

At Christmas, however, it seems like a good time to slow down and reflect on all the changes and milestones that have happened in the past year.  God is good, and wonderful times have been enjoyed amidst all the transitions. 

So here we are, alive and well, wishing you all the very best and God’s richest blessings and peace as we begin a new year!

To briefly catch up on a few of our big changes this past year, here are the highlights:

February: Logan turned 9!

March: Our offer was accepted on our new house!

April: Audrey turned 6!

May: We moved!

We left our Crown Point house after living there 7 years.

June: We are now St. John, IN residents.

Fourth of July Kids Parade

July: New babies!

We added a new niece on the Darling side and will be adding another new niece or nephew on the De Groot side in 2016!

August: New school!

Logan and Audrey started school at Providence Christian Academy.

September: Emily turned 5!

October: Change of pace

We went to the Great Wolf Lodge in the Wisconsin Dells for the kids’ fall break.

November: We hosted Thanksgiving at our new house.

December: Two Christmas programs

Emily was the star in her preschool Christmas program (the 3 wisemen followed her and her light up wand through the audience), and Audrey had a solo in our church Christmas program.

As I look back over old blog posts and Christmas cards we sent in years past, I am reminded how quickly things change.  People change, fashions change, seasons change.  In no time, all the gifts will be opened, the trees put away, and the lights turned off.  It will no longer be Christmas; it will just be winter.

But the baby in the manger remains.  He is our Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, and Prince of Peace.  God is with us, Emmanuel.  And that truth remains the same yesterday, today, and forever!

Reflections

Seven years ago, we said hello and goodbye to our first daughter, Brianna Dawn, as we held her tiny frame in our arms. 

In the past two weeks, I have grieved with a friend who lost her fifteen-year-old son, Angel, to a long fight with his medically-fragile body and another friend who lost her newborn son, Isaac, at delivery.  My heart breaks all over again for them and for my own loss again as the memories flood back.  I am wishing there was something I could say to mend their broken hearts.  I know all too well what lies ahead for these friends.  I hate the harsh reminders that we live in a fallen world and that life is so, so fragile.

This year, our annual trip to the cemetery was the bitterest, coldest year we’ve had so far.  The temperature was 10 degrees, but with the 20 mph winds, the wind chill was –17 degrees.  We plodded out to Brianna’s grave, snapped a picture, and almost immediately made our way back to the car where it still took several minutes for our fingers and cheeks to stop throbbing from the cold wind.

In the couple of minutes that we were at the grave, I noticed that someone had already brought flowers.  Fresh, red, Valentine flowers were resting against her headstone, hand-delivered by Luke’s brother Nate.  We were touched.  We also received a few cards, texts, and small gifts in Brianna’s honor.  Although our hearts still ache for the daughter whose short life we never cease to celebrate, we left knowing that our girl is loved – and remembered! 

Life is fragile, but God is faithful.

This is the first year I noticed a huge mirror on the wall at the bakery where we go for cupcakes on Brianna’s birthday every year.  I don’t know if I’ve just never looked at it before or if it is new décor, but I was reminded of this verse, “Now we see but a poor reflection, as in a mirror.”

Though we would give anything to celebrate Brianna’s 7th birthday with her in person, we thank God for His sovereign plan and the way He continues to carry it out in our life.  Now we only see what He is doing through a mirror, but one day we will know fully and see Him clearly – face to face!  Even if none of this pain makes sense right now, it will in the light of His glory.  All will be made clear.

“For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.”  I Corinthians 13:12

Saturday Night Sponge Rollers

Happy New Year!!

A new beginning and a fresh start!  How I love pulling out a brand new calendar and hanging it on the wall.  January 1 is a chance to take a deep breath and start anew.  I have already begun to reflect on what this coming year might bring for our family, and I am thankful that I can look forward to what God has in store knowing that He will be with us.  This morning I am reflecting on this verse:  “May the God of all hope fill you with joy and peace as you trust in Him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.”  Romans 15:13

Blessings to you as you embark on the year 2015!

Photo taken at Youche Country Club on New Year’s Eve

Cousins at Christmas

Over the past few days, my kids have had lots of opportunities to play with all their cousins! They were thankful for good health, mild weather, and cousins who are also good friends!

Merry Christmas from our family to yours!

A thoughtful hand-drawn purse from my precious daughters.

My favorite people in their new Christmas pjs.

Christmas fun in Chicago

We took the kids to Chicago and saw the musical “Hansel and Gretel,” visited Santa, ate at Mity Nice, walked through the Lego Store, and enjoyed all the window displays and holiday decorations.  Oh what fun!

Teeth, Teeth and more Teeth!

Audrey has had quite a lot going on with teeth lately!  Back in November, she lost her first tooth.  She swallowed it while eating a cupcake at school, so she wrote a note to the tooth fairy and wanted the paper to be shaped like a tooth.

The next day I found this entry in the journal she bought at the school book fair.  I love how she loves to write and sounds out the words she can’t spell.

“In Kindergarten I lost my tooth when I was eating a cupcake.  It was good.  My lost tooth fell out.  It was fun.”

Then, less than 3 weeks later, she lost 3 more teeth in a playground accident!  I received a call from school that Audrey had been in an accident on the slide and that she had a very bloody mouth -- not a phone call any parent wants to receive!

I was in the middle of holiday baking at a friends house, so I left Emily there and raced over to school.  Audrey was waiting in the office.  When she opened her mouth, I could see one bottom tooth and one top tooth had been knocked out.

Thankfully, Luke is a dentist, so I immediately drove with Audrey over to his office.  Luke decided the other top tooth had to come out too, so he pulled that tooth out as well.  Luke was happy that only baby teeth were involved in this accident, and I guess she’ll just have a few years to sing “All I want for Christmas is my two front teeth.”

Afterward Audrey requested a cherry milkshake for lunch, and we were happy to oblige.

Her new smile!

 

Piano Recital

Tis the season for a Christmas piano recital.  Logan played “Gentle Mary Laid her Child” and “Frozen Heart.”  He really does a great job and doesn’t seem to get nervous at all when playing in front of a formal audience (an informal audience, though, is another story!).

Logan and his piano teacher, Miss Ann.